Re-Member Your Self Beautiful

 I figure I am traveling backward through my 20’s. I am about 24 years old but my mind is ancient. I have the calm and the knowledge of an elder and I see you coming to me with your anxiety. Up all night on speed and ecstasy having drunk so much so as not to feel the rising panic. Sweating and shaking and you are only 18.

I say, “just take three days away from it all.” You feel great and now it's the weekend and you dive under the waves again, forgetting what it took to get you feeling good, and so the cycle repeats.

You shout over each other getting louder and louder. You took three days off and became clear and pure again. But the minute it ended you drank your coffee and you ate your wheat and cheese and now you are tired and lethargic again. Can't get out of bed. Irritated and angry, shouting and not listening when you were at yoga and you had it all. You had vibrancy and excitement and idealism. Now you are stuck again at the bottom of the trough.

I am here to remind you that when you lose your practice, or when you have no practice, you are lost. Practice is just that. You do the exercise, the routine. until Grace catches you up and it is a rock to stand upon. Breathing in itself is a great practice. Being present to the breath. That breath that is gifted at birth and leaves at death. Breathing is brilliant.

The mind will continuously be busy. It will think this and that and none of it is important. Stillness is important. Presence is important. Being calm and real and feeling the wind and sun on your skin. Not running away from feeling but being real and present and here.

I need you to hear. I need you to stand with me in order to change the unconscious, programmed, mind-numbing, hypnotic trance we've been encompassed by. Thrill-seeking, addictive, repetitive spell… let's be spell breakers.

If you have all your wits about you, you would not harm yourself or each other. We have been lock-stepped into a societal self-destructive pattern in order for those to harvest our basest emotions. These things live and they are able to be harvested and taken in order to feed a bottomless pit of darkness.

No matter what the name you call it: religion, media, government…step outside of it. Step outside of the norm. Get outside the box. Refresh yourself. Use that reset button. Come back and discover who you truly are.

You are Good at Center. You are Whole and Holy. You are the only one capable of getting yourself out of this prison. How? Through stillness, practice, and discipline. It will take you there, to yourself, and you are beautiful. Don't take the pill of escapism just for a momentary opening only to have the door slammed in your face. You get a glimpse of beauty and then it's ripped away. Make beauty ever-lasting. Become beautiful.

(Written 2016 after time in Ibiza as Chef at Finca Organica) Mike Poser - I Took a Pill Last Night- Ibiza

I Must Have Every

 

I must have every self-help, DYI, “How To” book on health and spirituality. I have taken countless workshops. The idea of passing along another lecture or doing a workshop just tires me out!

There are many roads to Mecca, paths to God, diets, and practitioners to point the way. I am only one Way Shower and my sincerest hope is that there is something in my story that will strike a chord within you and we can then begin the journey together to discover where you are, and what is your deepest wish for yourself, your life and your world.

I'm not going to tell you anything. You tell me.

What's holding you back, standing in the way, preventing you from stepping into the life you want? Awareness is the first key to unfolding a path into Well Being: I mean Well Being in every sense of the word. I don't mean fixing anything. I mean revealing your juicy core, your true authentic self, your mission, your passion, and your light. Whether that means unraveling the traumas that have brought you the fine suit of amour you currently wearing: defensive words, thoughts, and a body you don't like or trust. And it's not your fault!

It is said you have to take 100% responsibility for the reality you are creating, but that doesn't mean beating yourself up. Everyone has their own rhythm and style, their own timing, and their own unique signature that makes them who they are and beyond those experiences and labels is freedom! If you start from the resistant point you will get more resistance. It's just the way the universe works. It's the separation of judgments, anger, fear that are the pain points. We get to tame them like a wild tiger. No poking and provoking.

I am going to tell you my story briefly. I am going to share with you the tools I gathered in my journey that helped me. You may have more to contribute and I will have a resource page for further investigation. But for right now I will tell you a story about Mary:

I was born in the USA to two educated fairly sophisticated parents who were deep into their own realities: mum into God and Dad into business. We lived in an affluent neighborhood in a small town. I went to public school, suffered incest from a grandparent, and was very precocious later to be very promiscuous: during my 20's (goes with the territory of sexual abuse).

I neither knew I was beautiful nor knew I was smart. I did poorly in school. I cried a lot! While I matured into a very smart and beautiful girl, inside I felt "bad!" I felt worthless and a failure. No matter how hard I tried to please my parents and then the multitude of boyfriends, I felt like the portrait of Dorian Gray: one day the rottenness would come outside for all to see.

That never happened.

I went through my 30's being a married woman for 5 years. I tried marriage three times with no good result. I gave birth to an absolutely stunning human being, who today is living a successful life in a committed relationship.

What lingers? The sense that somehow my sexuality is broken, although I am well past menopause and have been single for almost 18 years! I took a vow to be celibate and I dream that I am celibate and I feel free being celibate. Not for everyone, but good for me!

love me now. It took almost 70 years! From the time I was 41 years old to now I made a heartfelt pledge to "Get To God No Matter What!" I tried everything: Holotropic breathwork, Dynamic Meditation, Tantra (nonsexual) Shamanic Journey Work - with and without plant medicine, massage, hypnotherapy, permaculture, traveled to exotic places, and met scores of interesting people.

I think the most influential and transformative practices and experiences have been being part of the Birth of The Universal Human with Barbra Marx Hubbard; Moving to New Zealand and studying at Wellpark College of Natural Therapies - Yoga, Yoga Therapy, Ayurveda, Ho'opponoppono The Huna Science of radical forgiveness and compassion, and my horse.

We can't do this on our own. We get to become aware: to see and feel so that we can agree on the kind of world we want to live in as sovereigns. We have created every facet of this moment and, only in this moment, is there the opportunity to do anything at all about that experience as the Creators. Love is the only thing that moves or changes anything. Starting with Self.

First of all, let us investigate:

1. Where am I now?

    A. Take time to describe how you are feeling, your judgments joys thoughts on yourself. Tell me your story briefly here.

   B. Physical State of Being Now: Health Assessment

    C. Who am I truly without judgment and labels and criticism?

You can draw, you can do a vision board, or write. You can sing! Be creative!!!

2. Who am I?

    Get quiet and let the answers come. Look in a mirror and gaze at yourself. Take a big piece of paper and colors and draw your essence.

3. What is my mission?

4. If I could wave my Magic Wand what would I change?

5. What am I supremely happy with about myself and my situation: describe what works and want doesn't work. (Make a T cross on a big piece of paper and first write down what doesn't work on the left and what does work on the right.)

I'd love to see pictures, hear your voice, meet you in person or on the internet. Whatever works for you. I want to connect with you, feel you, and know you. We are like super sleuths collaborating on discovering the Mystery of YOU. You've got an ally, a friend, and a companion on this journey. I can't walk it for you but I can definitely support you in the way you see yourself going forward (and even in the stuck places!). Especially in the stuck places cuz that's where the treasure lies!

 With all the information coming at us through the internet I first thought: “Oh this is cool. I’ll just make a video and start spouting off about all the stuff I know” …. but there are so many talking heads out there. How to sift through to the gold?

Another thing is: how do we want to support our artists and those in the “gig” economy? With “social distancing” and quarantine the only way we can see our favorite artists is online. They need our financial support.

Many hundreds of thousands, if not millions, of us, have lost our livelihood - all concerts, workshops, and yoga classes have been canceled or postponed. I hear, “how are we going to entertain ourselves?” Wow! Is life about being entertained? Are we little children that have to be entertained? Or are we being “sent to our rooms?”

I like the idea that being confined or sent to our room is actually a Doorway to the Sacred found within us. With all the “entertainment” we’ve been lulled to sleep with…that bedtime story of "happily ever after." With all the things we use to distract ourselves, to numb ourselves out, to escape through addictions. to food, entertainment, sport, and so forth. Where are we now?

Are we shut up in our cells or are we being invited to see the open doorways? People in captivity actually grow from creating relationships with their inner life by contemplating, focusing, and thinking about what they love. Victor Frankl writes in his book, The Meaning of Life“ “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”

For the past 30 years, I have immersed myself in practices that take me to “My Room.” In that room I have found my voice, my Inner God if you will. Through singing, I have connected to Holy Name that is beyond description. I’ve done it alone. In many rooms. No one wanted to get up early. No one wanted to explore the inner depths where ultimate freedom exists as “Us,” or the calling to Be versus do. But I did.

The Way Beyond

Elder Wisdom - The Way Beyond

If you feel anxious and uncomfortable do you turn away or look further? Best to go through to the core of it because in Circular Science it will come around continually until embraced and then another problem comes forward. This is all of life: a quest, a "Hero's Journey," as Joseph Campbell called it. People have been pointing the way forever and no one really listens until their attention is caught: by troubles or by picking up the signs. If you are unconscious the tip of the spindle will prick you. In this case, it is the motion and the activity that is the deception and the lie. What is Truth is The Way Beyond.

If all of this life is movement, what happens when you stop? When does one stop pressing into and creating drama or resisting? It is in the "Gap" where the motion stops, or the breath stops. The Gap is where possibility exists. It is a crack in the solidity of time, of being, in that certainty of solid ground where there is nothing to stand on but opening, allowing the Beautiful Graceful Beyond. It happens at the peak of orgasm and it happens in meditation or contemplation or in activities that take you into “The Zone.” It is a form of Grace that you can’t buy, take a workshop on, or achieve from something you do. It’s nothing you deserve. It comes in its own time as a gift of recognition and turning towards the One.

In the end, we are in an Ever Present Now. There is No-Thing else. Only memories. Creating positive uplifting memories is part of it, as well as accepting, embracing, and diving into the Shadow where the treasures lay. “Life is suffering,” as the Buddha said. There are other ways: with dharma and practice, you can get into the driver's seat and orchestrate a life that is, in reality, a Revelation From Within. Reveal yourselves!!! Get in touch with the things that are actually calling to your heart and go there. Be that. Just do it. Just Be it… whatever that looks like... whatever it takes.

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Maryma

July 23, 2019